How many half-used planners do you currently or have previously owned?
Be honest with me…Two? Five? More???
You’ve searched for all the tips available on the internet and followed them to a tee, just to end up with more tatt, and not any more productivity. Most productivity advice is built by neurotypical brains, for neurotypical brains, and even some ADHD tips may not be suited to you.
So trying the same things over and over again that have non affect on you…
It’s just not going to work.
The Familiar Cycle We All Know Too Well
Like me, if you have ADHD, your relationship with routines probably looks a bit like this:
The Spark: You feel overwhelmed, so you decide this week is the week. You buy a new habit tracker. You write a pristine 10-step morning routine. You feel genuinely excited.
The High: Days 1 and 2 go brilliantly. You wake up on time. You drink the green tea. You feel like you’ve finally cracked the code to adulthood.
The Drop: Day 3 or 4 rolls around. You sleep badly. Or your cycle shifts. Or the novelty simply wears off and your brain flatly refuses to cooperate.
The Spiral: You miss one morning. And instead of just picking it back up tomorrow, an overwhelming wave of shame kicks in: “Why can’t I just do what everyone else does?”
The Abandonment: The planner gets shoved under a pile of mail, never to be spoken of again.
Sound familiar?
Here is what’s actually happening behind the scenes.
Why Standard Routines Break ADHD Brains
1. We run on dopamine, not clock time
Neurotypical brains get a natural sense of satisfaction just from ticking a box.
ADHD brains don’t. We run primarily on interest, novelty, challenge, and urgency. When a routine stops feeling new, our dopamine flatlines. Our brains simply crave stimulation.
2. Our energy is not linear
For women like us with ADHD—especially when you factor in hormonal shifts, sensory overload, and executive dysfunction—our energy fluctuates wildly from one day to the next. Asking yourself to complete a rigid 45-minute morning routine on a day where you have zero spoons left to give is setting yourself up for burnout.
3. The "All-or-Nothing" trap
ADHD thinking loves extremes. Either we do the whole routine perfectly, or the whole day is ruined. If we don’t have time for the 30-minute workout, we end up sitting on the sofa for two hours in task paralysis instead.
What to Do Instead: 3 Ways to Work With Your Brain
If rigid routines don't work, what does?
Here are three shifts that will actually support your nervous system:
1. Ditch the clock, use "Anchors"
Stop tying habits to exact times (like “7:15 AM: Journal for 15 minutes”). Time-blindness makes this an absolute nightmare.
Instead, attach new habits to something that already happens every single day. In ADHD coaching, we call these Anchors:
“While the kettle is boiling for my morning coffee, I take my vitamins.”
“When I sit down in my desk chair, I open my single priority sticky note.”
“When I brush my teeth at night, I plug my phone in across the room.”
Your existing life becomes the cue. No alarm clock anxiety required.
2. Create a "Minimum Viable Routine" (MVR)
Allow yourself to have two versions of your day:
Your Good Day Routine: When you have energy, dopamine is flowing, and you want to do the full walk, the meditation, and the proper breakfast.
Your Minimum Viable Routine (MVR): For the low-energy, overstimulated, "I can barely function" days.
Your MVR might just be:
Splash cold water on face.
Drink one glass of water.
Put on clean trackies.
That’s it. You still completed your routine. You kept trust with yourself. But you didn't demand energy you physically didn't have.
3. Match your day to your energy, not your to-do list
Some mornings your brain is buzzing and ready to tackle the difficult project. Other mornings, looking at a spreadsheet makes you want to bawl your eyes out.
Start asking yourself one simple question each morning:
“What is my energy capacity today, and what is the single kindest thing I can take off my plate?”
The best thing you can give yourself…is grace.
Building sustainable systems when you have ADHD isn't about forcing yourself to become someone you're not.
It’s about shedding the shame, understanding how your nervous system actually operates, and building gentle rhythms that catch you when you fall.
If you’re tired of the endless cycle of starting over, this is the exact work we do inside The Flourish Method—our self-paced digital programme designed specifically for overwhelmed women with ADHD. No rigid schedules, no guilt trips, just compassionate, realistic tools to help you stop surviving and start flourishing.
And if you prefer hands-on, personalised guidance, you can also explore our 1:1 ADHD coaching packages (often fully funded through the UK’s Access to Work scheme!).
Take a breath, put the planner away for today, and be gentle with yourself. You're doing much better than you think.
Until next time, Peeps xoxo
